


Dates and Miscellaneous Teasing

by Silver_Quil



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist
Genre: Crack Pairing, Edlyn being a blushing dork, F/M, Kain being a blushing dork, Partial Genderbending, Teasing, fem!Ed, originally posted on ff.net
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-16
Updated: 2014-01-16
Packaged: 2018-01-08 22:12:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1138008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silver_Quil/pseuds/Silver_Quil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Fuery works up the courage to ask out a Fem!Edward Elric, and the office teases him for it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dates and Miscellaneous Teasing

It was no secret that Kain Fuery had a crush on Edlyn Elric.

Well, no secret to everyone except Edlyn Elric.

It was quite a wonder how she didn't notice, really. Surely she must have seen the blushes that came over his face when any time he mustered up the courage to talk to her (which was, sadly, far and few in between), didn't she get a hint when he bought her flowers for her birthday? But the older Elric was clueless in love, and the chances of her noticing anyone's affections towards her were zero to none.

And that was a problem for the sweet and ditzy member of Mustang's team.

Kain was quiet, a little dorky, and shy. Not exactly the best combination for confidence. He barely had (if any) confidence when it came to the romantic aspects of a relationship. Really, he might've been just as clueless as Edlyn if he hadn't had experience. But he was persistent and full of determination.

And he was determined to confess his feelings.

...

Alphonse Elric sat outside in the military courtyard, looking up mindlessly towards the bright blue sky that was speckled with lazily moving clouds. Birds chirped happily in the trees surrounding the courtyard and squirrels ran from tree to tree cackling. The young boy was lost in his thoughts, so lost that he didn't notice the hesitant footsteps that stumbled towards him.

"Al-Alphonse?"

The suit of armour that doubled as the soul-jar for the younger Elric looked up, "Huh? Oh! Mr Fuery! Did you need something?"

Kain fumbled nervously with the stack of papers in his hand as he looked towards Alphonse, a blush creeping up his neck. He shook his head quickly, "Oh, um no. But I did need to ask you a question."

"Oh, sure, go ahead."

"Well, I was wondering...I was wondering..." the black-haired male looked off to the side, embarrassed, while Alphonse stared at him curiously.

"Wondering what?"

Kain took a deep breath, "Iwaswonderinghowyouconfesstosomeoneyoureallyreallylikeand-"

"Uh, could you say that again? I couldn't quite catch that..."

Fuery became flustered all of a sudden and he nearly ran away, regretting his idea immensely. He looked down with a fiery blush plastered on his cheeks, "Alphonse, how do you confess to someone you really, really like?"

Al sighed, "This is about my sister isn't it?"

Kain's head snapped up, his blush intensifying, "H-how did you know?!"

"You were pretty obvious..."

"O-oh."

Al sighed again and stood up, brushing the grass off his front and back. He sidled up to the shorter man, nearly knocking Kain's head against his arm. He muttered a soft 'sorry' then looked off to the side. His foot tapped nervously upon the grass and his leather gauntlets fumbled with each-other.

"I think you should ask her out on a date first, and then tell her there."

Fuery looked up in a surprised manner at Alphonse, blinking a couple times in an attempt to process the boy's words.

"But, what if she says no?"

"I don't think she will."

Fuery blinked again. He was puzzled by Alphonse's tone, he sounded so sure, he sounded like he knew he couldn't be wrong. But why wouldn't Edlyn say no? She had every reason in the world to reject him, he wasn't exactly the best looking person alive, he wasn't a brilliant alchemist, his glasses didn't even stay on straight most of the time! Why should Alphonse sound so sure?

"Um, okay." was all that he intelligently managed to sputter out. He checked his watch, he had that meeting soon.

Fuery started to walk off towards the entrance of the building, "Thanks for your help, I have to leave now-"

"Ah, wait!"

The soldier stopped walking and turned back to the boy.

"What is it?"

Al looked sly, well, as sly as a person like Al could look.

"Sister and I should be near the entrance after work, she has to stay behind and do paperwork."

"Um, near the entrance?"

"Yup! See you then!"

...

Edlyn stood stock still, still processing Kain's question. She stared at him for a moment, then widened her eyes as a fiery blush spread across her cheeks. She looked to the side for Al, who could possibly offer help, or a distraction, but found nothing.

She looked back to Fuery, who was looking awfully flustered himself, his cheeks ablaze and hands fumbling with each other. She opened her mouth to speak (or try to).

"I, um..." her mouth felt as dry as cotton.

"You don't have to if you don't want to." Fuery looked slightly downcast, his disappointed eyes tilted towards the ground to avoid her eyes. She shook her head fervently, waving her hands with her eyes widened and her face flushed.

"N-no, I'd like to go with you! U-um, what time?"

Fuery brightened a bit, a small blush dusting his cheeks, though he seemed surprised. "Er, seven. I'll pick you up here after work tomorrow."

"O-okay."

Kain walked away with a wide smile, Ed could've sworn that she saw him pump hs fist in the air. Sighing, she turned backwards to find Al standing right behind her. Out of reflex, she leaped backwards. Ed clutched her chest and glared up at her brother. "Geeze Al, you scared me."

He scratched the back of his head, "Sorry...So, what did Fuery want to talk to you about?"

Ed's fading blush came back full force and her hands covered her steaming face, she didn't notice her brother's oddly smug tone. "He-he, um, asked me on a date."

The smugness radiated off him in waves. Alphonse probably would have wiggled his eyebrows had he had any, and smirked if he could. "And you said...?" he asked.

"I said I would go."

Al chuckled and Ed blushed deeper beneath her hands.

...

"Winry stop!"

"Oh come on. It's a date. At  _least_ wear this."

"NO!"

Al sighed at the loud voices coming out of the bedroom of the hotel. It had been like this for at  _least_ thirty minutes. As soon as Winry (her train home having been delayed) had found out that Ed had a date (ie, as soon as they had gotten home), she had dragged Ed to the bedroom and locked the door. Then they had started arguing, he assumed, about dresses and makeup. Both of which Ed did NOT want to wear. On the upside, Ed had been too distracted to notice the cat he had stashed in his chest plate. He took it out and smiled down at it fondly, petting it with his hand. It purred loudly and cuddled up to him, then jumped away with a howl at that deafening crash that sounded from the bedroom.

"Dammit Ed, just put on the dress!"

"No way in hell!"

Al sighed again and tried to coax the cat out from under the table, to no avail. With a click of the lock and a sudden slam, the door opened, revealing a fully gussied up Ed in a short red dress with a white sweater and gloves. Her makeup consisted of a dark eyeshadow that contrasted against her stunning golden eyes, a small amount of rouge on her cheeks, and a sparkly lip-gloss. Her golden locks flowed in curly cascades down her shoulders. Scowling, Ed pulled at the flowing fabric, attempting to cover herself better, but had no more luck than Al had had with the cat. She glared at Winry fiercely, while the other merely smirked back.

"You look nice sister."

Ed stopped glaring and turned back to Al, surprised. "Y'think so Al?" he nodded.

"Well I guess I look okay..." she looked down at herself, frowning.

"You look great Ed, now if you would just put on the heels-"

Ed glared again at Winry and crossed her arms firmly, tapping her foot on the floor. "Win, you already stuffed me in a dress and attacked my face with makeup. I'm drawing the line at heels."

"But then what will you wear for shoes?"

"My boots, obviously."

"Nope."

Winry dragged Ed back to the bedroom again, and many shouts and scuffles ensued. No less than five minutes later, Winry had Ed in a set of black flats she had brought along. Ed was practically fuming by the time Winry dragged her, quite literally, from the room. The blue eyed blonde checked the clock, then shoved the alchemist out the door and into the hallway. Ed stumbled then turned backwards to hear Winry call at her to get going before the door was slammed in her face.

Ed fixed her hair then walked down the staircase to the lobby, gaining many stares. She walked quickly out of the revolving door, only to bump into none other than Roy Mustang.

"Excuse me miss- Fullmetal is that you?"

She glared at him and scoffed, "Of course it's me Colonel Bastard, what are you doing here anyway?"

"Well I was going to ask you for the paperwork-"

"I left it in your office."

"Oh."

The two stood in the lobby in silence for a few moments, both looking off awkwardly to the side, then Roy turned back to her. "Why are you dressed like that anyway?"

"I, uh, have a date."

Roy stared at her open-mouthed, his eyes wide to the point of ridiculousness. She smacked him hard on the arm. "Hey bastard, what are you staring at me for?!"

"Who is your date?"

"Oh, um...Fuery."

" _Fuery-?!_ "

"Yes bastard. Now if you'll excuse me, I have someone to meet." And with that, the blonde stalked out the door, not noticing her superior's eyes staring surprised after her. She ran off down the sidewalk, running extremely fast in an attempt to not be late for her date. Ed arrived at the entrance of HQ out of breath and panting hard, her hair slightly wind-blown and her cheeks appearing even more red. Fuery glanced up from his place on the side of the wall and immediately blushed. Ed really did clean up nicely.

Ed looked up at him "Sorry I'm late Fuery-"

"It's alright. And, um, call me Kain."

She smiled, "Alright Kain."

"So, uh, shall we?" he offered an arm sheepishly, which she took.

"We shall?" She said to him. Kain grinned at her like the dork he was and she grinned back (like the dork she was), and they walked off down the street, chatting and smiling and laughing.

...

"So let me get this straight,  _Ed_ went on a date with  _Fuery_?"

"Apparently."

Havoc's cigarette dropped out of his mouth and landed on the wooden desk, embers still burning. He quickly regained his composure and smirked. "So he finally grabbed a pair and asked her out. Good for him."

Hawkeye smiled slightly at the boys' conversation, then shifted her armful of paperwork and set it down at her desk. The door clicked open, everyone looked up to see Fuery plopping a giant pile of paperwork onto a side table. "I picked up the paperwork for the Colonel Lieutenant."

She smiled at him and hefted the paperwork into her arms, "Thank you Fuery."

"You're welcome." he said as she walked away into the Colonel's office. The rest of the team (excluding Falman) took that as a cue to start interrogating Fuery.

"So Fuery, how was the date?"

A blush wormed its way onto the younger man's face, he covered his face. "How did you know- nevermind. It was, um, fine."

"What exactly happened between you two?"

"Did you steal a kiss?"

Kain blushed even deeper, his cheeks darkening to the point of them looking like he had plums instead of cheeks. "I-I, um-"

The door opened with a creak, and the two Elrics poked their heads through. Fuery's blush instantly faded. Both walked in and greeted the team, Ed gave a smile and a small wave to Kain which he easily returned with a dorky grin. She grinned back and moved over to kick open the door to Mustang's office. Al unexpectedly stayed behind and moved over to Fuery. Fuery smiled up at him.

"Hi Alphonse!"

"Hello." his voice was flat, he looked down at the small man menacingly. Fuery's grin faltered.

"Alphonse...?"

"Fuery, you and my sister are dating. I approve of it, but just understand that she really, really likes you, and if you break her heart I will break you." all of the team looked up at him with disturbed expressions, Al was absolutely terrifying. His voice remaining blank and flat as a dark aura rolled off him in waves. The echoing nature of his voice sent shivers up everyone's spines. Fuery cowered, and rightly so.

"Do you understand?"

"Y-yes sir."

"Good!" Al's tone was happy and cheerful once more, really,  _really_ out of place for what had just happened. He patted Fuery on the shoulder and skipped off into the Colonel's office, practically radiating sunshine and butterflies. Kain clutched at his chest, afraid his heart had stopped out of fear. Havoc and Breda shivered while Falman rubbed the tops of his arms, feeling as though he had been dipped in a pool of liquid nitrogen.

"That was...terrifying." Havoc stated with a shiver.

"No kidding..."

The chill settled after a few minutes, returning the room to its original warmth. And work continued on normally, or as normally as it could go, for the most part. Ed came out of the office with her brother trailing close behind, They chatted with Kain and the team for a couple minutes, then left smiling while Ed called over her shoulder.

"Goodbye Kain! See you tonight!"

As soon as the Elrics left, the team instantly leapt upon him.

"Oh, so a first name basis huh  _Kain_?"

" _And_ another date tonight?"

Kain's groaning face went into his hands, the team teased, and Hawkeye dispersed several bullets when she came back from the office.

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little one-shot I wrote for my friend, CheetahLover101 on FF.net. It's nothing really special, and it's not really my best writing...oh well.


End file.
